What a week, what a soul enhancing, confusing, thrilling, amazing, wonderful week! On Sunday night I couldn’t wait for the week to start, thinking that my anticipation and eagerness was because of all the challenges that I needed to problem solve for at work. But it turned out that my soul knew that there was so many lessons that it needed to tackle this week and so the universe couldn’t wait to test me and show me my growth and evolution through some events that almost felt unreal.
I love people, I love helping others grow, learn and be their best but most importantly be happy and madly in love with themselves. I find nothing more fulfilling than helping another soul find its evolution and soul journey. So there is no surprise that I mentor a handful of individuals that I’ve crossed paths with at work and whom are seeking help with their soul journey’s and ambition to fall madly, deeply and truely in love with themselves. It is such a blessing to be involved on their journey with them, to gain insights into their souls and learn about their fears, insecurities, hopes, dreams, likes, dislikes and everything in between. Through our conversations I too learn from them, giving me insights into myself and my evolution.
One particular individual that I mentor is a young man who is very familiar to me, our soul journey’s are so aligned and similar that I find myself surprised every time. On the surface we have nothing in common and yet in our depths our lessons, learnings and experiences are one of the same; it’s an extremely beautiful experience, gaining insight into your own soul through that of another. Whilst our conversations are focused on his growth and his evolution, I can’t help but learn my own lessons. I think highly of him as a person and I feel so proud of the growth and learnings he has been able to make over the past few months; it’s such a wonderful thing to witness someone grow and slowly fall in love with themselves.
But there were a few hidden and important lessons for me to learn this week which I have been able to pass with grace, courage and love. It all began with a reminder I was giving him about the importance of staying focused on one’s journey and evolution. In giving him this reminder it was a great reflection moment for myself, so I paused and sat still with my own thoughts, behaviours and focus and it didn’t take long to realise that my mind was starting to fall into it’s usual traps of building narratives that took my focus away from what really matters, myself. I observed the narratives that were starting to form and within them I found the traps of control, impatience and distraction. My first lesson was that I’ve become better at observing my narratives and realising when they are not self-serving. My second lesson was that these narratives we’re distracting me from my soul journey of self-love, self-trust and growth. These narratives were starting to distract me by making me curious about the familiarity I felt with this individual, about what it meant or could mean. My ego was trying to distract me from healing and trying to direct me towards a path that I am not ready for nor want at this stage.
These lessons were great insights into my inner conflict of the soul and the ego, this unplanned and unforeseen territory was testing both my ego and my soul; and I was determined that my soul would be the winner this time. My final lesson, which was the most brave and eye opening of them all, was when I decided that I will not entertain any thoughts that don’t serve me, that I won’t continue with narratives that don’t bring me joy and that I will not lose focus from my soul journey and undo all my efforts. There was only one way to do this and that was by gaining the courage, clarity and determination to seek the insight I needed from someone other than myself, from him. Now before I get into my final learning I want to point out that my plan was to gain insight into curiosity that was being formed, I wasn’t going into this conversation to gain any form of affection or promise; in fact, I didn’t want any of that. My intent from this conversation was to free myself from the narratives, to regain my focus on my soul journey and to test my level of self-love.
Being someone who likes to talk things through I spoke to a few people about my plan and most people tried to sway me away from this brave conversation, they thought it was driven by overthinking and that no good would come from it. But I knew deep down that this had nothing to do with overthinking and had everything to do with putting myself first, not being afraid about loving myself and doing what’s best for me. I learned that it was my ego seeking the opinion of others and that my soul needed to come out stronger, so I practiced self-trust, I backed my decision and I went ahead with the conversation.
I knew this conversation was my solution and the best thing for me, but I wasn’t sure how I would show up to it and how I would come out of it. I didn’t have any fear because I’ve learned that fear is a state of mind and that we can choose to be brave; it just depends on how much we want something. The very definition of brave is about your readiness to face danger or pain, it’s not about the absence of these.
Brave (adjective)
ready to face and endure danger or pain; showing courage.
I was ready to regain my focus and so I pressed ahead with the conversation and he gave me the clarity I needed, he addressed my curiosity and helped me regain my focus into my journey. At the end of this brave, honest, open and direct conversation I was left feeling incredibly proud, strong, beautiful, independent and most importantly brave. It turns out that I am much braver than I gave myself credit for, much stronger than I even knew and more evolved than I realised. I handled it all with grace, self-love, kindness and positivity. The universe was trying to show me how far I’ve come and how far I can go. I mean I am still in shock that I’ve actually had a conversation like this but I’ve realised that the curiosity wasn’t about him, or us, it was my soul trying to show me how far I’ve come and how much self-love and self-trust I’ve managed to build, making less and less room for self-doubt, pain and ultimately the ego.
On your soul journey you don’t really pay attention to how far you’ve come unless life forces you to stop and recognise it. We all have our own journey’s, our own lessons and our own narratives. More often than not we are not brave enough to do what we want, ask for what we want and or be who we are; but this is not because we are not brave inherently, it’s because we worry too much about the judgement of others, the perception we will leave and the pain we could feel. What we don’t realise is that deep down we are all brave, we just don’t know it. Deep down we have all the tools we need for self-trust, self-love and joy; but we’re distracted by the many things that surround us.
We are deserving of joy, peace and love. We are deserving of everything we dream of and everything we want. So next time you find yourself in a situation where you have to show up as your brave self, don’t let the opportunity pass you by. The feeling you have afterwards, makes it all worthwhile and it turns out it isn’t as scary or intimidating as we are thought to believe by our egos.
Be brave, be happy and always, always trust yourself.
Love Always,
Miss Dreamer
Souloom™ 