Time and time again I find myself in fearful, doubtful or worrying thoughts about the future which is unknown and somewhat out of my control.
When I’m unwell, I get really anxious, frustrated and angry because I’m sick and tired of getting sick so often. But then today as I was making my salmon, all down and sad about being sick and about everything that I have to do between now and a few weeks time when I leave for London, I realised I’ve been here before.
So why am I thinking and behaving the same way as I always have and which has never served me well? Habit. That’s why.
So I started reminding myself some key lessons and showing gratitude for the blessings I do have, because focussing on what we are grateful for is much more fulfilling then whinging about things we wish were different. Even if the whinging is just in our own head, it still serves no purpose. So here are some facts to remind ourselves when we find ourself in the constant loop of whinging and negativity:
Fact: the future is always scarier in our thoughts than it is in reality, almost every time we reach the future, we realise that our imagination about it was a lot more creative than it actually is.
Fact: I’ve been sick many times before and I will get sick many times more, wanting things to be different doesn’t make them different; but showing up to the challenge (whatever it may be) with a new attitude, that’s what makes the difference.
Fact: almost everyone underestimates their own will-power, courage and strength. But if you reflect on all you’ve been through, what you’ve overcame and where you are now, you will realise how brave you really are.
Fact: no one will ever come to save you, it’s not anyones job but your own to love yourself out of every challenge, every hardship and every fear. Others are simply cheerleaders, cheering you on from the sideline, they are not the ones who will make the winning goal for you.
Fact: we forget that our worries from yesterday rarely come true today and yet we start worrying about our tomorrow like the worst is yet to come. Our brains are bored, they have immense horse power, so find something simulating to do that puts it to better use.
Fact: everyone is weak, everyone is strong, everyone is fearful, everyone is courageous, everyone is lost, everyone is clear. We are all full of contradictions and opposites, that’s what makes humans so fascinating.
Fact: being present, truly present, is the cure to almost everything.
Fact: losing control is needed, those who are high control need to start feeling comfortable with this fact, life is not about having control.
Fact: accepting yourself for who you are is the best gift you can give yourself and those around you. Be authentic and real, you’re worth it.
Fact: everyone has their own challenges and struggles, everyone has their own narratives and stories; be kind to others even when they’re not kind to you, because that’s all they know how to be for now.
Fact: expectations are the deadliest weapon for relationships, whether that relationship is with yourself or others. Let expectations go.
Fact: being loved by others is only important if you’re not utterly in love with yourself. Once you are, then any love that others give is an added bonus, not a necessity.
Fact: even those among us who are strong and wise, need someone to lean on from time to time. Everyone wants to feel special and cared for.
Fact: when you are torn and unsure about which path to take, know that there is no right or wrong, just a different adventure awaiting you.
Fact: we can’t have everything all the time, but we don’t need anything most the time, other than our own kindness, love and presence, having these will help us be grateful for any blessing we do have.
Fact: people don’t give themselves enough credit, give yourself some credit!
Fact: there is so much to learn and so many mistakes to make; it’s ok to make the same mistakes more than once, only if you learn to forgive yourself for them.
Fact: we’re all loved, we just don’t know it.
Fact: ……..
Love Always,
Miss Dreamer
Souloom™ 