Some love is forever, some for short periods of time. Some friends are a mirror, reflecting back your efforts, others are a lesson, teaching you hard lessons in life.
Reflecting back on my life, I can see how there are so many loved ones that have passed through and are no longer a loved one. I’ve questioned if this devalues their worth to me or if this is simply a form of evolution. Each relationship has fulfilled it’s purpose, some brought with them insufferable pain, grief, heartache and loss, others brought highs, joys and precious memories that will never be replicated or replaced. Nevertheless, all have fulfilled their purpose on my soul journey, just as I have fulfilled my purpose in their soul journey.
I’ve made mistakes, where my stubborn ways have cost me compassion, forgiveness and understanding. I’ve made assumptions and judgements to help protect my view of the world, instead of giving the benefit of the doubt to those around me. I’ve made choices which have impacted my relationships, sometimes for better and sometimes for worse. I’ve been a bad friend, though unintentionally and for that I am both sorry and wiser. I realise now that compassion is more important than being right, that forgiveness is more important than holding onto anger and that there are always two sides to a story.
I understand now that relationships, love or experiences aren’t meant to be forever, not in a depressing way, but in a valuable way. Some may last a lifetime, in which case they are precious gems to be celebrated and honoured. But for the most part, it’s best to remove any expectation of permanence in all aspects of life. When you realise that all is fleeting, you understand it’s worth in even more. Once you understand that every interaction is the blessing for that exact moment in your life, you see the miracles that have been granted to you.
Love is an interesting concept, one which is desired by all yet feared at the same time. Loving others, whether it be romantic or not, means being vulnerable to the feeling of impermanence. Means feeling comfortable with the idea that for whatever reason, at some point there is a goodbye involved. I’ve been so afraid of these goodbyes but reality is that they’re inevitable and so there is no point denying the inevitable. Even if relationships were to last a lifetime, death will be experienced at some point and a goodbye will still be experienced. For a very long time, the thought of losing loved ones to the pages of time, to the changes of life and to the circumstance of fate equated to an unimaginable grief for me. But grief doesn’t have to be a dirty word that we want to avoid. Grief is inevitable and so it’s a precious gift showing us that there was something valuable in our lives that mattered deeply to us. That despite it’s loss, the memories and experiences can never be taken from us, perhaps that’s sufficient. Perhaps, we need to celebrate the experiences as the gifts they were and hope that we get more of these blessings in different shades and shapes throughout our lifetime.
We don’t know why we cross paths with the people that we do, that’s the mystery which only time will reveal to us as we go through our journey’s and as we experience the lessons of life. But every interaction has something to teach and the chance to leave some form of impact. Make these moments matter by showing up to them with love, compassion, joy and acceptance. Be present for these precious gifts and experience them full-heartedly and without the fear of goodbye or loss; because you never know what the intent of crossing paths with people is.
Love Always,
Miss Dreamer
Souloom™ 