I am starting realise that joy and risk are brothers, you can’t pursue joy without also taking a risk on something you believe in, someone you love, something you’re passionate about and most importantly yourself! I have come to learn that faith and courage are partners, you can’t find one without the other. Faith leads you to courage and courage is where faith lies, it’s hard to know where one starts and the other fades.
I’m starting to notice that not knowing yourself is the outcome of pleasing others; living for their joy, their needs, their wants and not your own. I’m starting to understand that fear is a choice and one that you can both promote or demote based on what you value. I’m beginning to realise that growing up isn’t just about ageing or doing adult things, it’s also about letting go of pain, grief and misunderstandings that you’ve accumulated along the way.
I’m beginning to question if there is a need for someone else to take care of me. If I know how to truly take care of myself then the presence of others becomes about THEIR presence and not because of MY void. I’m beginning to understand that my critical thoughts are only there because I’ve not loved myself hard enough. I constantly need to remind myself that I do have a choice, I get to decide the quality of the life I lead and yes there will always be challenges, grief and pain along the way but I will have the opportunity to find the silver lining amongst it all if I so wish.
I’m beginning to appreciate that loss isn’t always bad, if you recognise the beauty that was there before it ended. I’m learning that evolution takes various shapes and forms, but at the core of it you have to determine if you’re in it to rise or in it to fall. I am can recognise now that comparison only fosters resentment, bitterness and self-pity, so I replace it with grace, inspiration and celebration instead. The only way I can increase my own value is by ensuring I raise others behind me, next to me and across from me.
I’m starting to notice that I look at the cup half empty instead of half full, that needs to change. I’m starting to pace myself for the life long journey I have of remembering my worth, loving myself and chasing what I want in order to meet joy. We are the owners of our own narratives, the sooner we pick up the pen and write our own truth, the sooner we can be liberated from the lies of the world around us and the expectations of others.
Love Always,
M
Souloom™ 